Comments for Elevating the Soul http://elevatingthesoul.com Contemplating the Spiritual, Emotional, and Psychological Sides of Life Thu, 15 Mar 2012 20:25:25 +0000 hourly 1 Comment on Social Anxiety by admin http://elevatingthesoul.com/social-anxiety/comment-page-1#comment-511 admin Thu, 15 Mar 2012 20:25:25 +0000 http://elevatingthesoul.com/?page_id=639#comment-511 Hi Wes, sorry for my delay in responding as I do not monitor this site as much as I used to. I understand what you say, I have been there, and many others have been too, although the circumstances are always slightly different. Social anxiety is very hard thing to go through, because the very nature of it makes us apprehensive to seek help or talk about it. So the fact you spoke out and could voice what you are going through is an amazing step. Most people don't even do that. Most of the tools I used to overcome anxiety are discussed above. I should point that some anxiety is ok. It won't totally go away. Anxiety can serve some positive purposes such as protecting from people or situations which may hurt us. Anxiety also will not go away instantly. It is a process. Therefore, I encourage you to take the steps mentioned in the discussions above. Feed yourself a constant stream of uplifting internal dialogue. Your body and mind will fight, continually telling you that you are not those things. That is proof it is working. Keep it up. At the same time try to question any negative thought that comes into your mind, don't just accept it. Social anxiety is often associated with a low self-esteem which is usually fed by a steady stream of negative thoughts about one self. Scrutinize these thoughts and question whether they are true. While at the same time reminding yourself of all your positive attributes. Some other tools are mentioned above along with trying separate thoughts from reality. Often we project (or imagine) so much about what others think and feel about us, yet we have absolutely no idea whether it is true or not. We imagine all sorts of things, often negative, but have no evidence for it other than our own negative thoughts. Change the thoughts, and the perspective changes. I wish you well, and with some patience and work you will get through this. If you continue to struggle I recommend that you seek a qualified therapist. Being able to discuss anxiety candidly and openly with someone can have a very therapeutic effect in itself. Best wishes. Cory Hi Wes, sorry for my delay in responding as I do not monitor this site as much as I used to.

I understand what you say, I have been there, and many others have been too, although the circumstances are always slightly different.

Social anxiety is very hard thing to go through, because the very nature of it makes us apprehensive to seek help or talk about it. So the fact you spoke out and could voice what you are going through is an amazing step. Most people don’t even do that.

Most of the tools I used to overcome anxiety are discussed above. I should point that some anxiety is ok. It won’t totally go away. Anxiety can serve some positive purposes such as protecting from people or situations which may hurt us.

Anxiety also will not go away instantly. It is a process. Therefore, I encourage you to take the steps mentioned in the discussions above. Feed yourself a constant stream of uplifting internal dialogue. Your body and mind will fight, continually telling you that you are not those things. That is proof it is working. Keep it up. At the same time try to question any negative thought that comes into your mind, don’t just accept it.

Social anxiety is often associated with a low self-esteem which is usually fed by a steady stream of negative thoughts about one self. Scrutinize these thoughts and question whether they are true. While at the same time reminding yourself of all your positive attributes.

Some other tools are mentioned above along with trying separate thoughts from reality. Often we project (or imagine) so much about what others think and feel about us, yet we have absolutely no idea whether it is true or not. We imagine all sorts of things, often negative, but have no evidence for it other than our own negative thoughts. Change the thoughts, and the perspective changes.

I wish you well, and with some patience and work you will get through this. If you continue to struggle I recommend that you seek a qualified therapist. Being able to discuss anxiety candidly and openly with someone can have a very therapeutic effect in itself.

Best wishes.
Cory

]]> Comment on Social Anxiety by Wesley Adams http://elevatingthesoul.com/social-anxiety/comment-page-1#comment-470 Wesley Adams Tue, 13 Mar 2012 08:40:30 +0000 http://elevatingthesoul.com/?page_id=639#comment-470 Im suffering from either social anxiety,low self-esteem,social phobia,depression or all of the above...ive grew up in a mixed household where cousins,uncles and aunts lived under one roof basically,it was almost like an "orphanage" although i was living with my family. As i was growing up my grandmother looked after us. Me,my brother,sister and two cousins (our mothers are sisters but each one from a different father who were non-existant). i was the soft one,i guess maybe i needed abit of more attention than the others. My mother was "hated" by my grandmother,we (me and my sibilings) were treated very badly and emotionally abused (im speaking for myself). i dont know if anything happened in my family before i was born but i cant understand how a mother(my grandmother) could literally have a favourate son or daughter. My mother wasnt one of that favoured ones, i dont remember much of my chilhood just that much of that sibiling rivalry(between cousins) would end up in me getting the short end of the stick and coz my mom who was threated numerous times that she would be kicked out on the streets with her kids that was a burden,she would tel me to give in,forget,nevermind,always be the one to "lose" just to keep the peace in the house.throughout my whole childhood...i became soft it began to brek my spirit,my self worth,not that there was any to begin with coz i remembered hearing that from day one...its like i developed being the punshing bag,i used to play with my cousins toys and "lose" intentionally just to make him feel good so that i can play with toys that i never had...i hated my mother getting treated badly by my grandmother,so i believed what she said i turned the other cheek. Because i was so soft and so unopposive i was made fun of (an easy target to pick on) i felt dirty,unwanted and unimportant,the only consolation i had was the thought that "god sees everything and oneday i would be rewarded"...i eventually withdrew into a shell,my own world,only me having me and if i was mistreated or made fun of i would just blank it out...they say a child becomes who he is in the first 5yrs of his life,what abt the first 10 or 15 and its almost irriversable...i went through primary and secondary schoollike that quiet,low self esteem. with this huge weight on my shoulders,depression. I was made fun of and teased thoughout my life,i never had more than one friend at a time,i never used to ask questions in class or stand up for myself,i always avoided a situation where my character was tested or where i have to get out of my comfort zone...i had an autistic attitude,i missed out on alot of things in life...im 24 now,im married got no kids but my wife has 2,shes 29...did i take a women like this coz im looking for that attention that i never got,and that shes older than me she would make all the decisions in life coz i dont have the confidence to do so...i never had that stimulation as a child to be a leader,make my own choices. i got a good job and im still being made fun of because of my non-existant confidence...i dont talk much to people...its affecting my marriage aswell,my wife finds me boring,no fun,she told me its like i dont have any spirit,any life inside me...im not comfortable with myself and the way i am...i hate being like this...i wana be happy,fun,confident,talkative person. FORGIVE ME IF MANY THINGS I WROTE DONT MAKE SENSE,THIS IS ISSUES I BURRIED DEEP INSIDE MYSELF, BUT IT WONT GO AWAY...PLEASE HELP Im suffering from either social anxiety,low self-esteem,social phobia,depression or all of the above…ive grew up in a mixed household where cousins,uncles and aunts lived under one roof basically,it was almost like an “orphanage” although i was living with my family. As i was growing up my grandmother looked after us. Me,my brother,sister and two cousins (our mothers are sisters but each one from a different father who were non-existant). i was the soft one,i guess maybe i needed abit of more attention than the others. My mother was “hated” by my grandmother,we (me and my sibilings) were treated very badly and emotionally abused (im speaking for myself). i dont know if anything happened in my family before i was born but i cant understand how a mother(my grandmother) could literally have a favourate son or daughter. My mother wasnt one of that favoured ones, i dont remember much of my chilhood just that much of that sibiling rivalry(between cousins) would end up in me getting the short end of the stick and coz my mom who was threated numerous times that she would be kicked out on the streets with her kids that was a burden,she would tel me to give in,forget,nevermind,always be the one to “lose” just to keep the peace in the house.throughout my whole childhood…i became soft it began to brek my spirit,my self worth,not that there was any to begin with coz i remembered hearing that from day one…its like i developed being the punshing bag,i used to play with my cousins toys and “lose” intentionally just to make him feel good so that i can play with toys that i never had…i hated my mother getting treated badly by my grandmother,so i believed what she said i turned the other cheek. Because i was so soft and so unopposive i was made fun of (an easy target to pick on) i felt dirty,unwanted and unimportant,the only consolation i had was the thought that “god sees everything and oneday i would be rewarded”…i eventually withdrew into a shell,my own world,only me having me and if i was mistreated or made fun of i would just blank it out…they say a child becomes who he is in the first 5yrs of his life,what abt the first 10 or 15 and its almost irriversable…i went through primary and secondary schoollike that quiet,low self esteem. with this huge weight on my shoulders,depression. I was made fun of and teased thoughout my life,i never had more than one friend at a time,i never used to ask questions in class or stand up for myself,i always avoided a situation where my character was tested or where i have to get out of my comfort zone…i had an autistic attitude,i missed out on alot of things in life…im 24 now,im married got no kids but my wife has 2,shes 29…did i take a women like this coz im looking for that attention that i never got,and that shes older than me she would make all the decisions in life coz i dont have the confidence to do so…i never had that stimulation as a child to be a leader,make my own choices. i got a good job and im still being made fun of because of my non-existant confidence…i dont talk much to people…its affecting my marriage aswell,my wife finds me boring,no fun,she told me its like i dont have any spirit,any life inside me…im not comfortable with myself and the way i am…i hate being like this…i wana be happy,fun,confident,talkative person. FORGIVE ME IF MANY THINGS I WROTE DONT MAKE SENSE,THIS IS ISSUES I BURRIED DEEP INSIDE MYSELF, BUT IT WONT GO AWAY…PLEASE HELP

]]> Comment on The Magnet of the Past by karen10362 http://elevatingthesoul.com/archives/998/comment-page-1#comment-72 karen10362 Wed, 11 May 2011 01:48:18 +0000 http://elevatingthesoul.com/?p=998#comment-72 Very nice article and topic, Cory. I enjoy your writing and thought style. Have not been here in a while, but am pleased to find this article. Right on for me! I'll check back for the continuation. KO Very nice article and topic, Cory. I enjoy your writing and thought style. Have not been here in a while, but am pleased to find this article. Right on for me! I’ll check back for the continuation. KO

]]> Comment on Social Anxiety Page Updated by admin http://elevatingthesoul.com/archives/813/comment-page-1#comment-69 admin Sun, 16 May 2010 22:14:22 +0000 http://elevatingthesoul.com/?p=813#comment-69 And the page has been updated again a couple times over the last 24 hours. And the page has been updated again a couple times over the last 24 hours.

]]> Comment on To Live Inside a Passion… by admin http://elevatingthesoul.com/archives/679/comment-page-1#comment-68 admin Sat, 15 May 2010 22:15:24 +0000 http://elevatingthesoul.com/?p=679#comment-68 Thank you for your comments on the different articles. Your feedback is appreciated :) Thank you for your comments on the different articles. Your feedback is appreciated :)

]]> Comment on Meditation-Creating Peace by elektra_angeleka http://elevatingthesoul.com/archives/470/comment-page-1#comment-67 elektra_angeleka Sat, 15 May 2010 09:38:21 +0000 http://elevatingthesoul.com/?p=470#comment-67 the power of the mind is incredible...for some reason when reading this i thought of someone like a prisoner of war that is being held hostage using this technique to help them get through and help keep their faith and hope alive. Truly this technique can be used by anyone at any time as you say and would prove to be a very useful resource to eliminate stress and bring a sense of serenity to mind. i am going to employ this. the power of the mind is incredible…for some reason when reading this i thought of someone like a prisoner of war that is being held hostage using this technique to help them get through and help keep their faith and hope alive. Truly this technique can be used by anyone at any time as you say and would prove to be a very useful resource to eliminate stress and bring a sense of serenity to mind. i am going to employ this.

]]> Comment on Tower Meditation-Additional Concepts by elektra_angeleka http://elevatingthesoul.com/archives/485/comment-page-1#comment-66 elektra_angeleka Sat, 15 May 2010 09:21:12 +0000 http://elevatingthesoul.com/?p=485#comment-66 this is what the secret teaches..visualization of where you are going will help to manifest it in your life. so true. nice cory! this is what the secret teaches..visualization of where you are going will help to manifest it in your life. so true. nice cory!

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